Transformers Revenge of the Fallen

[grond]

The Decepticons are so villainous and destructive that they have even managed to destroy my love of Transformers in general. Actually, it isn't their fault. After all the robots only got about 45 minutes out of the 2 plus hours in which they got to be in a second, slightly smaller, dimmer spotlight. And it was the comic relief-bots that got most of the screen time.
The first movie had an excuse. It had to introduce the Transformers in order to make them significant players in America's struggle against . . . um . . . the Transformers
But this time around they had the nerve to waste the 1st 45 minutes of my time showing me all about some dweeb-become-hero getting started at his new life in college. Where were the flickin' robots!!!! And no, his little awkward touchy-feely moments with Bumble-Bee, in which he treats the giant, extremely advanced robot like a dog, or a tragically brain-damaged childhood friend, and the robot responds in a justifying manner ( ), DON'T COUNT!
And since when were Transformers born the same way as vampires in "Van Helsing" and people who were freed from the matrix! I thought that they were made from other machines given a "spark" the way the first movie showed it. Now they come out of eggs looking like half aborted insects embedded in a coal miner's loogie? WTF!!!!! (no number of exclamation points came convey how loudly I shouted the expletive phrase initialed above at the time I typed it).
Seriously, they should have remade the old cartoon, either in a single installment or a trilogy, with today's graphics in a "live-action" version. And maybe removed the break-dancing junk planet robots, but as popular as dance-off movies seem to be I think the dancing junkbots are keepers.
Wow, that was a rant. I can't stress how depressing it is to want to see a movie about the robots I grew up with, and watch all of their doings revolve around the petty lives of suburbanites. GARRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!

[pigdish]

I totally concur with your views about this piece of turd movie franchise. Thankfully I still remembered how much I hated the first movie to stay away from this one.

[grond]

Yeah, I forgave the first movie on account of that whole "we have to introduce the transformers in a relatable yet suspenseful manner" line of bull leavings. Oooops
This one followed the same stinkin' progression, and managed to be over-all far far worse. Revenge of Fallen is right, the fallen hopes of a decent transformers movie.

[Rincewind]

*sigh*. Well, I was going to stay away from it in the theatre anyway. I had hopes that the second movie would be about the Transformers. C'est la vie. I was forewarned by NPR mentioning something about a dog robot humping someone's leg.

I found that the best part about the first movie was the set I got containing an extra DVD with the backstory of the Transformers on it, with Megatron's real voice actor doing Megatron's voice. That animatic was basically what I would have wanted the actual movie to be. Regardless of how bad the second movie is, I'll probably get it on DVD as long as there are nice features like that with it.

Frankly, I don't even buy the movie toys. Those insect faces bug the hell out of me. And people who know me and our old house well should realize that if I'm not buying a series of Transformers toys, there's a problem. And some of the most tempting toys in the new batch actually look so terrible as robots I wouldn't take 'em if you paid me.

Ah well, that's the end of my little rant. I haven't seen it yet, but hopefully there'll be some redeeming DVD extras to make it worth my while. In the meantime, there are some wonderful G1 and G1-style toys from Japan I'm looking at from BigBadToyStore.

[grond]

I'm going to quickly push a handy trick I've found for dealing with train wreck, you gotta see them, even if you don't want to, stupider than watching a cow sleep, but harder to look away from than . . . I'm getting off track here, the movie you know you'll hate, but can't keep from watching. Red-Box. 1 dollar a day, from the time you rent it, until 9pm on the next calendar day, and a dollar for each such day after that you keep it. If you're sure you'll hate it, why pay more than a dollar to find out. You can find them at Turkey Hills, Giants, Weis, and a few others. Find the nearest location online (I don't know the site), and if you aren't squeemish about using your credit card online (the red-box works on credit card only, fyi) you can reserve the title you're looking for to the Red-Box nearest you. Shameless hawking concluded.

[Steve]

While I still point and laugh at your obvious "bring back the old stuff i hate the new stuff" bias, I agree it was a terrible movie. The plot was nearly nonexistent, the humor was pathetic, and the plot holes were big enough to fly Megatron (who, for some reason, is a jet?) through.
Everyone I talk to says the only redeeming quality is Megan Fox, but I've stopped finding her attractive since the day I realized that she knew she was nothing but a piece of meat and was okay with that.

[Rincewind]

Yeah, I'm not big on Jet Megatron either. I understand why he's not a pistol- heck, that got a bit silly even in the G1 cartoons- but his most sensible remake has always been a tank. It's pretty much his embodiment of raw, destructive power. Hence the T-Rex and dragon in Beast Wars, they go with the theme. A Cybertronian airplane? Hell, you've got Starscream as the leader of the Decepticon Air Force already, with his many, many clones. One more plane gets lost in the shuffle.

Mind you, as a toy, that Megatron pistol is cool as hell, particularly the Japanese versions that fire little plastic bullets.

[grond]

It isn't so much of a "I hate the new stuff" bias, as it is a "I hate this really pathetic new trash" bias. I'm all for reinventing or envisioning the old classics, such as the more recent batman films saving the franchise from its disastrous decade in the 90s, but Batman Begins was a movie largely about Batman, not a teenage gaffer caught up somehow as Batman's all important ward and at the same time leader. That is why I appear to have an obvious bias.
To counter the bias, Iron Man and to a slightly lesser extent The Incredible Hulk were very enjoyable movies, I'd be willing to say grade A. They are new "remakes" of old classic characters. Also, the new Last House on the Left was vastly better than the seventies version which had all of the quality dialogue and acting one would expect out of cheap adult video entertainment.